Rev. Peanut's Slapper's Spaghetti
Slapper’s Spaghetti (Pasta Puttanesca):
Southern Italian dish roughly translated as “whore’s pasta”.
Necessary Items:
1 Slapper.
500g spaghetti or linguini, or whatever pasta you like, really. I like spaghetti.
500g chopped tomatoes.
4 or 5 anchovy fillets
100g roughly chopped olives. Traditionally, the recipe uses black olives. I’m a bit of a rebel and prefer green.
50g capers, rinsed and roughly chopped.
4 tablespoons of olive oil.
3 cloves of garlic, again roughly chopped. No good cop, bad cop routine here. Bad cop all the way.
2 or 3 chillies again again roughly chopped. Naturally for this recipe I use penis peppers…ouch.
Some chopped parsley
How to do it:
1. In you little hands, rinse the anchovy fillets well under cold running water for about 30 seconds. Squeeze them as though you really, really love them to get rid of as much moisture as possible. This process retains the all the molecules of delicious anchovy flavour but removes excessive saltiness.
2. Gently fry the garlic, chilli and anchovy fillets in the oil, stirring continuously to dissolve the anchovy and prevent the garlic from burning. A couple of minutes should turn the trick. Sorry. Should do the trick.
3. Remove the garlic. Or leave it in. Whatever.
4. Add the tomatoes, olives and capers and continue to cook on a medium heat for somewhere in the region of twenty earth minutes.
5. Cook and drain the pasta of your choice. Cook it al dente, as this recipe calls for it to be a little hard…
6. Add the spaghetti to the sauce and heat through for a couple of minutes, tossing while you do so. No turning. Just tossing.
7. Sprinkle with parsley and serve to any random, passing harlot.
