Rev. Peanut's Mulberry Gin & Tonic

Strictly speaking, this has nothing to do with chillies whatsoever, but feck it, I'm the Reverend and god told me to do it.

Necessary Items:

A bottle of gin

A bottle of tonic

A handful of ripe mulberries

A number of ice cubes

The slice of the lemon

How To Do It:

Open the bottle of gin.

Open the bottle of tonic.

Pour yourself a large G&T and drink it. This will make room for the mulberries.

Early in the morning, go round the mulberry bush a number of times picking a handful of ripe, purple mulberries on your way.

Hop and skip back up the garden in a very Enid Blyton kind of way, stopping off briefly at the conveniently placed lemon tree to pick a, you guessed it, lemon.

Once back in the house, stuff the mulberries into the bottle of gin. Replace the cap and shake vigorously, as though you had an earwig in your underpants.

Leave it for a few days to infuse and then strain off the gin.

Pour a measure and add ice cubes, tonic and lemon and enjoy while admiring the development of your chilli plants.