An introduction of sorts.

 

 

I’ve always enjoyed cooking. I’ve never been much good at it, as many would agree, but I’ve always enjoyed it. One of the reasons I’ve never considered myself that good a cook is because of recipes. Feckin’ recipes. I used to always follow recipes but seldom achieved the end result that I had expected. So I adopted my own cooking philosophy and things dramatically improved. It is, quite simply, the belief that a recipe is a wonderful and necessary invention that should be read and then largely ignored.

 

After all, what is a recipe? Essentially, it’s a list of ingredients written down on a piece of paper by someone who happens to like those ingredients. I used to find myself making things like Moussaka, from a recipe naturally, and wondering why I didn’t like it. Then I realized – I feckin' hate aubergines. So I tried it with courgettes, because I quite like courgettes. “You can’t make Moussaka without aubergines”, people would say. “Bollox. Mine has courgettes”, would be my reply. I also like garlic and chillies. Especially chillies. That’s why I’m writing this blog. I have learnt through trial and error that when a recipe calls for a clove of garlic, generally it’s best if I use three. If it begs for two medium chillies, then half a dozen habanero’s should do the trick. Three or four habanero’s, de-seeded or it may be too spicy? Half a dozen Ghost Chillies for me, seeds and all. Fuck it, throw in the whole plant.

 

So, to sum up, my advice would be to cook things you like, not things you’re told to like. The same goes for growing things. If you don’t like turnips then don’t grow the poxy items. And while we’re on the subject, grow what you like to cook. It doubles the pleasure and sense of achievement and gives you a reason to sit in the garden with a G&T. “I’ll be there in a minute, luv. Just watching me garlic growing”. I grow my own chillies, garlic, tomatoes, fennel, ginger and a variety of herbs. As a result, I go through a lot of gin and tonic. Luckily, I’ve also got a couple of lemon trees.

 

Don’t be afraid of flavours – pack ‘em in. Flavour subtlety is a regressive achievement that can only be reached by first going over the top and then working your way back. The opposite approach is called “blandness”. Avoid at all costs.

 

Experiment. Don’t worry if it tastes like shite. That just means you probably won’t make it that way again. If you do, then your issues run deeper than I am qualified to deal with. Play around with things until you get something you like. Then try to remember how you did it. Anyhow, if you don’t make mistakes then you’re not really trying. And there are always the dogs. They’re usually highly appreciative of any wayward culinary creations. And if you don’t have dogs? Get some. Five or six is a good number. I’ll be chucking in a few dog nutrition notes and recipes through the course of this blog. As well as what ever else takes my fancy.

 

Now, off you go into my little world. You may like some, or maybe even all, of the recipes detailed in the following pages. If you do, I would be very pleased. Very pleased indeed. If you don’t, please read the disclaimer above, commencing with the words “I’ve always enjoyed cooking…”, it clearly lays all blame for any indigestible delicacy produced firmly in your own lap. You should have followed the recipe, or maybe you shouldn’t have. Only you know the truth…